What a lovely day! I woke up early with a song in my heart which reminded me of why I am alive! I live to worship HIM! Beautiful song sung by our New Life Choir last night, sung with such anointing that I still bask in the spirit of reverence that resulted from the New Life experience!
Upon awakening, I immediately went to my phone and there was a reminder to read my Devotion! I opened my Bible app and MY scripture was up! Philippians 4: 13 It's going to be a real good day!
"I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME!"
I can accomplish the whole part of anything that I face, or whatever God brings me to do for Him, because of my fixed position in Him, my anointed Messiah. This knowledge and faith I have in Him gives me freedom, confidence, strength, rest and courage to do even greater works for Him.
Then my thought process took me to II Cor. 10: 4
The weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but are mighty through God, even to the pulling down of strongholds.
Then to Romans 8:6-7
For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace, because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.
We must let the law of Christ rule in our heart for to refuse it is spiritual suicide. The only way to be free from oppression, is to walk in His laws and to meditate upon them day and night! His Word is life!
If you are feeling oppressed, inadequate, fearful, or anything less than "I CAN!", there is reason for concern. God has given you every tool you need to walk in the spirit of peace. You just have to take hold of the Word (the tool) and USE it!
You see, because of my FIXED position in Christ, I am free from the oppressions and strongholds that once had me frozen in place! I am released because I figured out the "I CAN!". Now that I walk in freedom, my faith soars, and this releases even more strength for me to accomplish ALL that He has brought to me to do for Him!
Oh How I love Him
How I adore Him.
My breath my sunshine,
My All in ALL!
Hope you walk in freedom today and are living the blessed life that God intends for you! YOU CAN!
Monday, March 18, 2013
Friday, March 15, 2013
Your Breakthrough! From Fear to Faith!
Hello, all! I have enjoyed a nice long mental and physical vacation! I spent the time kissing my baby grandson Mason! I enjoyed time talking, cooking, and shopping with my lovely daughter, Shelly, (who I can say has become one of my closest friends), and being picked on by my sweet son-in-law, Josh, who I am so very proud of! He is a wonderful daddy and husband and adores my daughter! What more could a mom ask for? They are doing such a great job of raising a family, putting God first. I am so blessed to have them walking with Christ and being productive for His Kingdom. There is no greater blessing than to know your children are giving their entire life to further the cause of Christ. I admire their perseverance and tenacity. I learn much about patience when I am with them as I watch them walk daily waiting patiently on the Lord as a waitress would patiently wait on a patron of a restaurant. My time away was so refreshing, and I am renewed and happy to be back home in the swing of things.
I cannot tell you how much I missed my blog sessions with God! Nothing like time alone with Him, His kind of music, His Word, and just letting Him do the talking! I have spent a few days now dwelling on the thought "What is holding us back?" I feel the Lord is showing me and I pray He speaks to you through my ramblings!
Often in our walk with God in the area of reaching out to others, a thought or an idea will pop into our head and we quickly quell it without realizing it was from God and that the motivation for squelching it came from fear. If questioned or told we are full of fear, or called cowardly, we will quickly rise to dispute it. It is difficult to admit that fear has guided you. In fact I am so surprised at how many people have reached out to encourage me in my blog privately, because we just don't really want others to see or know that fear has sometimes ruled in our heart. I often use myself as an example, but just as often my words are shared from others who wish to remain anonymous! Fear is a bad word in anyone's world, but rest assuredly, if you are stopping yourself from doing something productive for the Kingdom, fear most likely is being allowed to rule you. It is that simple. We are emotional beings and fear is an emotion we feel, certainly, but know it is also a spirit outside of emotion which comes directly from the enemy of our soul who is very knowledgeable of our emotional weaknesses. I cannot get into the depths of this with just one blog, but I will try to address one aspect today in hopes that the recognition of it in yourself will lead you to the freedom Christ has intended for you.
What is really holding you back from stepping up to the plate in the area God is leading you to be productive? I am so bold as to say the war is going on entirely in your head and you have most likely not even voiced it to anyone else. If there is something God is prompting you to do and you have not yet stepped up to the plate, and are miserable in your indecision, you are being guided by fear.
Examine this thing that you feel to do:
Is it something you are equipped for in reality?
Fear will tell you you are not equipped, but in reality you are perfectly capable of accomplishing it! Doesn't the scripture say "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me?" Well, there ya go!
Does it require you to reach outside of yourself to touch others?
Does it involve you stepping outside of your comfort zone?
Will it be a stepping-stone for others?
If your answers are all yes... then it is high time you responded! If God is still dealing with you, it is not too late. Just get on board with it. Do the first step and you will be hooked!
One of the first battles we must fight when God is leading us higher into His work is this:
"Is this of God or is it just me?"... Most of us stop and won't get past this silly question! Yes we must have wisdom and know God is leading us, but really, I ask you, is it going to be the Devil who is calling us to do a work for Christ? I don't think so! So right off the bat, (lot's of baseball references today!) let's get past that question once and for all. If you are feeling to take action for the Kingdom of God, it is GOD who is compelling, even tempting you! Yes I said tempting you! He is holding a proverbial carrot before you and leading you upward saying, "Would you like to go higher in Me? Do this one thing I ask." God's instruction is always simple and can easily be done one step at a time. He gives clear direction! And in scripture how many times does his direction involve the word "GO!"? "Go thy way..., "Go and sell", "Go and tell no man"! Go and do that one thing!
Many times we fail right here because we are so busy praying "God, is this you?" and the moment passes. God tells us in scripture to walk in prayer. If one is walking in prayer, faith and wisdom will be no problem. We will be instant in following the prompt of the Holy Spirit and won't have to question the validity of the voice of God! So next time God prompts you to go pray with someone, or simply give them a hug, Tell yourself, "This is God wanting to flow through me." and then GO! DO THAT ONE THING!
How often have I been prompted in the Holy Ghost to go speak a word of encouragement to a sister, or go pray with someone, and I have sat miserably, heart pounding, questioning God, because I was afraid of the rejection of that person. Yes, in all honesty, that is what we are afraid of! Rejection! You and I are simply afraid of one another! ha! There, I said it! We will never ever get anywhere in this walk if we do not quit comparing ourselves among ourselves and get up off of our duff and go be loving and kind to one another, walking in love and in the guidance of the Holy Spirit to let HIS LOVE flow through us. Will we ever get the message that this life is NOT about I, Me, MY? What does it matter in the scope of salvation really if you are rejected? He was rejected, despised, abused and crucified! Yet still we sit in service after service fearful of one another, fearful of our guests and fearful of allowing God's love to flow freely! It's the silliest thing when put in print, yet it is what will shut down a move of God. Have you ever been in a service where the spirit of God was mightily moving, and then suddenly it just uncomfortably shut down? That is because someone was quenching the spirit which was trying to flow through them.
Many times I have been in a place of business and felt so desperately to speak to someone or invite them to church, or just a simple thing like speak a word of love to them, but I have stopped, frozen in place, questioning! Truth be told, my flesh was looking for an out! My fleshly desires do not parallel with my spiritual being. Pastor Paul Springer preached a message while I was in Mississippi about the two twins that live inside of you. Everyone has a twin. The good twin and the bad twin. It was a beautiful message and has captured my thought path these days. The twin you feed is the one who will rule the temple! We must step past this flesh if we are ever going to thrive in living for God. We must feed the spiritual man in prayer and study of His Word so that we can be free to walk in faith and in wisdom. Next time you are in a battle of what to do, mentally put your flesh down (the bad twin) and step over it. You will quickly find freedom and fulfilment as you (the good twin) are freed to walk in faith toward that thing which God is prompting you to do for Him!
I cannot tell you how much I missed my blog sessions with God! Nothing like time alone with Him, His kind of music, His Word, and just letting Him do the talking! I have spent a few days now dwelling on the thought "What is holding us back?" I feel the Lord is showing me and I pray He speaks to you through my ramblings!
Often in our walk with God in the area of reaching out to others, a thought or an idea will pop into our head and we quickly quell it without realizing it was from God and that the motivation for squelching it came from fear. If questioned or told we are full of fear, or called cowardly, we will quickly rise to dispute it. It is difficult to admit that fear has guided you. In fact I am so surprised at how many people have reached out to encourage me in my blog privately, because we just don't really want others to see or know that fear has sometimes ruled in our heart. I often use myself as an example, but just as often my words are shared from others who wish to remain anonymous! Fear is a bad word in anyone's world, but rest assuredly, if you are stopping yourself from doing something productive for the Kingdom, fear most likely is being allowed to rule you. It is that simple. We are emotional beings and fear is an emotion we feel, certainly, but know it is also a spirit outside of emotion which comes directly from the enemy of our soul who is very knowledgeable of our emotional weaknesses. I cannot get into the depths of this with just one blog, but I will try to address one aspect today in hopes that the recognition of it in yourself will lead you to the freedom Christ has intended for you.
What is really holding you back from stepping up to the plate in the area God is leading you to be productive? I am so bold as to say the war is going on entirely in your head and you have most likely not even voiced it to anyone else. If there is something God is prompting you to do and you have not yet stepped up to the plate, and are miserable in your indecision, you are being guided by fear.
Examine this thing that you feel to do:
Is it something you are equipped for in reality?
Fear will tell you you are not equipped, but in reality you are perfectly capable of accomplishing it! Doesn't the scripture say "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me?" Well, there ya go!
Does it require you to reach outside of yourself to touch others?
Does it involve you stepping outside of your comfort zone?
Will it be a stepping-stone for others?
If your answers are all yes... then it is high time you responded! If God is still dealing with you, it is not too late. Just get on board with it. Do the first step and you will be hooked!
One of the first battles we must fight when God is leading us higher into His work is this:
"Is this of God or is it just me?"... Most of us stop and won't get past this silly question! Yes we must have wisdom and know God is leading us, but really, I ask you, is it going to be the Devil who is calling us to do a work for Christ? I don't think so! So right off the bat, (lot's of baseball references today!) let's get past that question once and for all. If you are feeling to take action for the Kingdom of God, it is GOD who is compelling, even tempting you! Yes I said tempting you! He is holding a proverbial carrot before you and leading you upward saying, "Would you like to go higher in Me? Do this one thing I ask." God's instruction is always simple and can easily be done one step at a time. He gives clear direction! And in scripture how many times does his direction involve the word "GO!"? "Go thy way..., "Go and sell", "Go and tell no man"! Go and do that one thing!
Many times we fail right here because we are so busy praying "God, is this you?" and the moment passes. God tells us in scripture to walk in prayer. If one is walking in prayer, faith and wisdom will be no problem. We will be instant in following the prompt of the Holy Spirit and won't have to question the validity of the voice of God! So next time God prompts you to go pray with someone, or simply give them a hug, Tell yourself, "This is God wanting to flow through me." and then GO! DO THAT ONE THING!
How often have I been prompted in the Holy Ghost to go speak a word of encouragement to a sister, or go pray with someone, and I have sat miserably, heart pounding, questioning God, because I was afraid of the rejection of that person. Yes, in all honesty, that is what we are afraid of! Rejection! You and I are simply afraid of one another! ha! There, I said it! We will never ever get anywhere in this walk if we do not quit comparing ourselves among ourselves and get up off of our duff and go be loving and kind to one another, walking in love and in the guidance of the Holy Spirit to let HIS LOVE flow through us. Will we ever get the message that this life is NOT about I, Me, MY? What does it matter in the scope of salvation really if you are rejected? He was rejected, despised, abused and crucified! Yet still we sit in service after service fearful of one another, fearful of our guests and fearful of allowing God's love to flow freely! It's the silliest thing when put in print, yet it is what will shut down a move of God. Have you ever been in a service where the spirit of God was mightily moving, and then suddenly it just uncomfortably shut down? That is because someone was quenching the spirit which was trying to flow through them.
Many times I have been in a place of business and felt so desperately to speak to someone or invite them to church, or just a simple thing like speak a word of love to them, but I have stopped, frozen in place, questioning! Truth be told, my flesh was looking for an out! My fleshly desires do not parallel with my spiritual being. Pastor Paul Springer preached a message while I was in Mississippi about the two twins that live inside of you. Everyone has a twin. The good twin and the bad twin. It was a beautiful message and has captured my thought path these days. The twin you feed is the one who will rule the temple! We must step past this flesh if we are ever going to thrive in living for God. We must feed the spiritual man in prayer and study of His Word so that we can be free to walk in faith and in wisdom. Next time you are in a battle of what to do, mentally put your flesh down (the bad twin) and step over it. You will quickly find freedom and fulfilment as you (the good twin) are freed to walk in faith toward that thing which God is prompting you to do for Him!
Anyone feel the need to stop and pray for yourself right now? I do! Let's do it.... Let us stop right now and pray for ourselves. Pray for the good twin! Pray for freedom from the fear and flesh that tries to rule us. Ask God's forgiveness for not walking in prayer and for not being guided by faith. In prayer, picture yourself laying down this obsession with feeding self (the bad twin) and walking forward in faith and confidence that God will use you (the good twin) as a river of life to flow to others showing them the way to HIM! That's what it's all about!
Lay down self and make space for His love to freely flow through you! The breakthrough from fear to faith is simply a matter of time spent in prayer and then taking action to let Him flow!
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Cccccooourage! YOU do the math!
Today I will be traveling to Mississippi to get my fix! I have been planning this trip since Christmas and I am ready to get there already. However first one thing has happened, and then a storm.... well sorta! I had intended to leave last night, but that fell through... I intended to leave at 4 am... but the weather man predicted a storm. So I intended to leave at 6, then 7, then 8:30... in order to get behind the storm. As you can see it is 9:20 and I still haven't left. You know what... I am saddling up... and riding anyway! This waiting for a storm that may or may not happen where I am, is for the birds. I trust in the Lord to be my help, my guide, my protection. I have been cautious, Now I am taking courage by the reigns and singing, "Ride, Lolli, Ride!
Think about the word courage, and all that you know about the meaning of it.
(I am travelling today so I want you to do your homework!) Look up the definition. Look up scripture references. Study! Google it!
What are your areas of weakness, insecurity? Who do you feel insecure around? Are they people who can help you, or hinder you? Decide how important they are in your life and agree to let them be who they are. Understand you cannot change others, but you can change you and how you react to them. Rise above everything and everyone that intimidates you. Remember cast down every imagination! Many fears are completely unfounded. Maybe it is storming somewhere close by, but I only see raindrops! I am moving on!
Look deep into yourself! Find YOUR courage! The cowardly lion in the Wizard of Oz finally got his courage, but my goodness at the trouble he had to go through first! GET YOUR COURAGE!
Picture yourself being the best you, walking in courage and in victory! What do you see yourself achieving in this mental picture?... Now... Go ...do THAT!
You can do it!
I CAN!
Think about the word courage, and all that you know about the meaning of it.
(I am travelling today so I want you to do your homework!) Look up the definition. Look up scripture references. Study! Google it!
What are your areas of weakness, insecurity? Who do you feel insecure around? Are they people who can help you, or hinder you? Decide how important they are in your life and agree to let them be who they are. Understand you cannot change others, but you can change you and how you react to them. Rise above everything and everyone that intimidates you. Remember cast down every imagination! Many fears are completely unfounded. Maybe it is storming somewhere close by, but I only see raindrops! I am moving on!
Look deep into yourself! Find YOUR courage! The cowardly lion in the Wizard of Oz finally got his courage, but my goodness at the trouble he had to go through first! GET YOUR COURAGE!
Picture yourself being the best you, walking in courage and in victory! What do you see yourself achieving in this mental picture?... Now... Go ...do THAT!
You can do it!
I CAN!
Friday, February 15, 2013
"Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me!"
Well, this is NOT a blog I wanted to write today. When you make the conscious effort to be completely obedient, you have to follow through, even if it hurts a little!
Matthew 11:29-30
29. "Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
30. for my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
(This scripture may not seem relative right now, but it will before you finish, I promise!)
Today's subject is about learning to live with the fact that there are people who just do not like us! Oh sure, they say they love you or me with the love of the Lord, but their heart is not in it! It is obvious, and we all know it! They know it and (I am sure they hope I do not), I know it! I just do, and that is that! In some instances others have out and out told me that another doesn't care for me! I know this has happened to you as well. For the record, that "other" person probably doesn't have your best interests at heart either! Yep... a difficult thing to swallow, but there it is nonetheless and I am left to deal with this lovely knowledge! And DEAL with it, I MUST!
Yeah... not what I wanted to share today. I had this entirely different blog ready about the fear of the Lord! It was awesome! I've spent the entire week preparing it! And now God says this... and even confirmed it through a sweet text someone sent me:
"As leaders, when we demand perfection, we tell people to look to us.
When we are transparent with our own imperfections and are gracious
of the imperfections of others, we point people to Him."
Sooooo... I guess today I am pointing toward HIM with a big foamy finger! lol!
This blog may seem a ramble of thoughts and junk, but maybe that is what God is trying to say to me! "It's just junk. Shred the junk"! I certainly haven't conquered this one, but I am learning that His yoke is easy, and His burden is light.
For years I lived under the assumption that everyone just looooved me! (I was fortunate to be somewhat popular in school and I have many loving lifetime friends who add to my life daily. I know that I am very blessed.) Then I grew up and came to the abrupt revelation that there are people who were raised differently than me with different insights, abilities, and patterns of thought. I will meet new people throughout all the stages of my life and they will not know all that I am. They will form judgements of me through the words of others, or through misperceived judgements of their limited interactions with me. There will ultimately be a thousand other reasons why some people will just never click with me! Not everyone will agree with me on every level, and often I must agree to disagree! In fact, I must accept the profound revelation that not everyone I come in contact with is going to love me. I will face many people along the way who choose to have very little interaction with me at all. They are uncomfortable around me for whatever reason and it is most likely through no fault of my own. I cannot do enough random acts of kindness to change that fact! I must realize this is simply a part of humanity and I am not alone in this boat of life. Every single person alive faces these same issues. Some are able to deal with it better than others. I want to be one who deals with this level of insecurity by taking it to the One who created me, the One who knows how to fix me, in ALL my insecurities!
Several years ago I read a thought that I have tried to make part of my process when it comes to those who don't respond to my personality in the way I think they should. To put it more boldly, they do not like me, or even worse, they remain completely indifferent to me regardless of the effort I put into gaining their affection. The following is not a direct quote, but the main point:
Sadly, often the reasons for someone not liking you are their own naughty bunnies they have not yet slain! Jealousy, malice, envy, pride! I will add that quite possibly they feel threatened by you on some level. (jealousy, envy). Sometimes I find that the people who do not care for me are those who are most like me... and vice versa! However I make it a strong point to never show my distaste for them, for I see myself in them. That often leads me to the conclusion they are being just as critical about me as I am about them. And I am often wrong! Be very careful not to compare yourself to anyone, or you will find yourself entrapped in this vicious cycle for far too long and much damage will be done before you realize the err of your way.
... read between those lines! haha!
I have heard that if you want to win someone's affection, give a tangible gift to the person.
Proverbs 18:16 "A man's gift maketh room for him, and bringeth him before great men."
I have given and given and given! And I will continue to do so, because it is my nature, but I have also learned there are people who it will not move emotionally in the direction I wish. At least they will never let you know that it does. Those are the people who have problems that I cannot fix. I must completely place them in the hands of God. They will just have to deal with their own problem. I cannot give enough, pray enough, change enough, or help them in any way to overcome their problem with me. It is just a personality conflict that I will have to learn to live with and remain victorious over, regardless of how anyone else feels about me. I pray often that God blinds me to any one or any thing that distracts me from being obedient to Him.
Often we feel compelled to go to the person to talk the situation over. It is certainly within reason to do so, but I have seldom found it to be helpful. I have left feeling more vulnerable and empty and become a target for more of their naughty bunny tactics! Often they do not even realize the animosity they feel toward you, so when you approach them, it immediately puts them on the defensive. You may then find a whole world of anger dumped on you! Trust me, I have tried "the talk" and have come away with bear claw marks that left gaping scars even worse than the original offense. Don't misunderstand me, I am not referring to misunderstanding caused by actions that you need to repair. I am talking about personality conflict itself, not an actual situation that may have caused a rift. The Bible strongly guides us to go and talk together and do your best to repair these damages. The subject I refer to in this blog is about insecurity that causes you to feel you must do something to win the attention, approval, or affection of someone whose continual rejections cause you a great deal of heart pain. It is not pleasing to God to walk in this type of pain. You should accept it as your responsibility to free yourself from the yoke of pain, and recognize it as an opportunity to experience a different level of love from God Himself, a love that He requires you to learn of Him. It is entirely possible to come to a sincere love for any person regardless of whether they feel the same toward you, for we are commanded to love one another! There is no getting around this. This part of the equation is YOUR problem to solve! You must do the work in prayer with obedience to God in order to resolve it within your own heart.
I prayed recently and told God that this issue seemed to be a yoke of bondage around my neck. His response was... "Let that yoke guide you! It is for your protection!" OK! Wow! That is one of the most relevant words God has EVER spoken to me. I have begun to thank Him for the "Yoke"! I found it is only through that act of thanksgiving that I am able to overcome and share this with you today. It is in the process of cleaning out my heart and filling it with thanksgiving, that I am freed from the bondage of this particular insecurity! The yoke is still in place but the GUIDE is my loving God and with that realization I have been able to move freely in my life doing His work without seeking others approval, love, or even guidance! In so doing, I have found more love, approval, and guidance coming to me from those who genuinely love me and have my best interests at heart!
Often we try to attach ourselves to those who everyone seems to admire or respect, or who holds a particular level of status. We think if they approve of us, then the Hand of God's approval will rest upon us. No greater level of wrong ever existed! It is not the approval of man that we must yearn for, seek after. If Christ approves of me, flows through me, and blesses others through me, what other approval do I need? No one else's opinion of me should matter. I have alluded to this in previous posts, but today I am nailing it on the head. DO NOT SEEK AFTER THE APPROVAL OF MAN! Galatians 1:10 "For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ." Often times in pleasing Christ you will displease man. You should be prepared for this because you must stand your ground! Again, "Be ye strong in the Lord and in the power of HIS might!" Ephesians 6:10
There will always be people who do not respond to my particular brand of humor, personality, communication, blogging! lol! Yep! There will always be a few usual suspects who only read my blog so they can find more opportunity to disagree with me or prove me wrong. That is ok! I put myself out there fully aware that when I am effectively working for the Lord, I must accept there will be many fiery darts which come my way. I know how to dodge them, and it makes me more agile! So... Keep em comin'! I need the exercise! I have become secure in HIM so nothing can shake me or dissuade me from His purpose for me. I will not stop, back down, run in fear, be frozen in my commitment! I will not be governed by bitterness, resentment or any other naughty bunnies who try to foil me with their silly plots. Jesus Christ is God and Governor of my life. He is my guide and I know beyond the shadow of doubt, that He is calling me, equipping me and leading me into territory I have not yet discovered! With this knowledge I will strive to remain humble to His leading, accepting to any word He sends my way through any avenue. I will remain willing to turn the other cheek if my yoke so nudges me! I still have a way to go, but I am further than when I began! My security is in His grace!
And now I will stop and sit at His feet for awhile and let Him place His yoke upon me once again, and I will bear it with the same mercy and grace He has shown me. I will follow His lead and go through whatever door He so chooses to open unto me for I must be obedient to His yoke.
Hope this helps someone who is struggling in this area of insecurity! Look to Him! He will guide you. His yoke is easy and He will make the burden light! It is for your protection!
Matthew 11:29-30
29. "Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
30. for my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
(This scripture may not seem relative right now, but it will before you finish, I promise!)
Today's subject is about learning to live with the fact that there are people who just do not like us! Oh sure, they say they love you or me with the love of the Lord, but their heart is not in it! It is obvious, and we all know it! They know it and (I am sure they hope I do not), I know it! I just do, and that is that! In some instances others have out and out told me that another doesn't care for me! I know this has happened to you as well. For the record, that "other" person probably doesn't have your best interests at heart either! Yep... a difficult thing to swallow, but there it is nonetheless and I am left to deal with this lovely knowledge! And DEAL with it, I MUST!
Yeah... not what I wanted to share today. I had this entirely different blog ready about the fear of the Lord! It was awesome! I've spent the entire week preparing it! And now God says this... and even confirmed it through a sweet text someone sent me:
"As leaders, when we demand perfection, we tell people to look to us.
When we are transparent with our own imperfections and are gracious
of the imperfections of others, we point people to Him."
Sooooo... I guess today I am pointing toward HIM with a big foamy finger! lol!
This blog may seem a ramble of thoughts and junk, but maybe that is what God is trying to say to me! "It's just junk. Shred the junk"! I certainly haven't conquered this one, but I am learning that His yoke is easy, and His burden is light.
For years I lived under the assumption that everyone just looooved me! (I was fortunate to be somewhat popular in school and I have many loving lifetime friends who add to my life daily. I know that I am very blessed.) Then I grew up and came to the abrupt revelation that there are people who were raised differently than me with different insights, abilities, and patterns of thought. I will meet new people throughout all the stages of my life and they will not know all that I am. They will form judgements of me through the words of others, or through misperceived judgements of their limited interactions with me. There will ultimately be a thousand other reasons why some people will just never click with me! Not everyone will agree with me on every level, and often I must agree to disagree! In fact, I must accept the profound revelation that not everyone I come in contact with is going to love me. I will face many people along the way who choose to have very little interaction with me at all. They are uncomfortable around me for whatever reason and it is most likely through no fault of my own. I cannot do enough random acts of kindness to change that fact! I must realize this is simply a part of humanity and I am not alone in this boat of life. Every single person alive faces these same issues. Some are able to deal with it better than others. I want to be one who deals with this level of insecurity by taking it to the One who created me, the One who knows how to fix me, in ALL my insecurities!
Several years ago I read a thought that I have tried to make part of my process when it comes to those who don't respond to my personality in the way I think they should. To put it more boldly, they do not like me, or even worse, they remain completely indifferent to me regardless of the effort I put into gaining their affection. The following is not a direct quote, but the main point:
If someone does not like something about you, there is not much you can do to change the situation. You must learn to accept that there are people who will never embrace your particular personality. Ask God to mold you into the best person you can be, but accept that there will always be people with whom you will never be able to build a relationship. No matter how you may reach out to them they will not respond to your efforts. You will walk away feeling rejected and bruised. That is a given! Saddle up and RIDE anyway! However, you must not let bitterness fill that void in your heart that rejection has dug. You are still required to give them grace enough to allow them to not like you! You must, in your heart, say to them;
"It is okay that you do not like me, but it is your problem, and I will let YOU deal with it.
I will not waste one more moment trying to change anything about myself to conform
enough to fall into your graces!"
When you fully come to those terms, you will be freed to move on! The reasons another has for not liking you is their problem, not yours. The sooner you grasp this, the happier you will be, and the more free you will feel. If you are truly walking in Christ and trying daily to please HIM, then you cannot spend time fretting over these trivial matters of who may or may not like you, or what you can do to fall into their graces.
Sadly, often the reasons for someone not liking you are their own naughty bunnies they have not yet slain! Jealousy, malice, envy, pride! I will add that quite possibly they feel threatened by you on some level. (jealousy, envy). Sometimes I find that the people who do not care for me are those who are most like me... and vice versa! However I make it a strong point to never show my distaste for them, for I see myself in them. That often leads me to the conclusion they are being just as critical about me as I am about them. And I am often wrong! Be very careful not to compare yourself to anyone, or you will find yourself entrapped in this vicious cycle for far too long and much damage will be done before you realize the err of your way.
... read between those lines! haha!
I have heard that if you want to win someone's affection, give a tangible gift to the person.
Proverbs 18:16 "A man's gift maketh room for him, and bringeth him before great men."
I have given and given and given! And I will continue to do so, because it is my nature, but I have also learned there are people who it will not move emotionally in the direction I wish. At least they will never let you know that it does. Those are the people who have problems that I cannot fix. I must completely place them in the hands of God. They will just have to deal with their own problem. I cannot give enough, pray enough, change enough, or help them in any way to overcome their problem with me. It is just a personality conflict that I will have to learn to live with and remain victorious over, regardless of how anyone else feels about me. I pray often that God blinds me to any one or any thing that distracts me from being obedient to Him.
Often we feel compelled to go to the person to talk the situation over. It is certainly within reason to do so, but I have seldom found it to be helpful. I have left feeling more vulnerable and empty and become a target for more of their naughty bunny tactics! Often they do not even realize the animosity they feel toward you, so when you approach them, it immediately puts them on the defensive. You may then find a whole world of anger dumped on you! Trust me, I have tried "the talk" and have come away with bear claw marks that left gaping scars even worse than the original offense. Don't misunderstand me, I am not referring to misunderstanding caused by actions that you need to repair. I am talking about personality conflict itself, not an actual situation that may have caused a rift. The Bible strongly guides us to go and talk together and do your best to repair these damages. The subject I refer to in this blog is about insecurity that causes you to feel you must do something to win the attention, approval, or affection of someone whose continual rejections cause you a great deal of heart pain. It is not pleasing to God to walk in this type of pain. You should accept it as your responsibility to free yourself from the yoke of pain, and recognize it as an opportunity to experience a different level of love from God Himself, a love that He requires you to learn of Him. It is entirely possible to come to a sincere love for any person regardless of whether they feel the same toward you, for we are commanded to love one another! There is no getting around this. This part of the equation is YOUR problem to solve! You must do the work in prayer with obedience to God in order to resolve it within your own heart.
I prayed recently and told God that this issue seemed to be a yoke of bondage around my neck. His response was... "Let that yoke guide you! It is for your protection!" OK! Wow! That is one of the most relevant words God has EVER spoken to me. I have begun to thank Him for the "Yoke"! I found it is only through that act of thanksgiving that I am able to overcome and share this with you today. It is in the process of cleaning out my heart and filling it with thanksgiving, that I am freed from the bondage of this particular insecurity! The yoke is still in place but the GUIDE is my loving God and with that realization I have been able to move freely in my life doing His work without seeking others approval, love, or even guidance! In so doing, I have found more love, approval, and guidance coming to me from those who genuinely love me and have my best interests at heart!
Often we try to attach ourselves to those who everyone seems to admire or respect, or who holds a particular level of status. We think if they approve of us, then the Hand of God's approval will rest upon us. No greater level of wrong ever existed! It is not the approval of man that we must yearn for, seek after. If Christ approves of me, flows through me, and blesses others through me, what other approval do I need? No one else's opinion of me should matter. I have alluded to this in previous posts, but today I am nailing it on the head. DO NOT SEEK AFTER THE APPROVAL OF MAN! Galatians 1:10 "For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ." Often times in pleasing Christ you will displease man. You should be prepared for this because you must stand your ground! Again, "Be ye strong in the Lord and in the power of HIS might!" Ephesians 6:10
There will always be people who do not respond to my particular brand of humor, personality, communication, blogging! lol! Yep! There will always be a few usual suspects who only read my blog so they can find more opportunity to disagree with me or prove me wrong. That is ok! I put myself out there fully aware that when I am effectively working for the Lord, I must accept there will be many fiery darts which come my way. I know how to dodge them, and it makes me more agile! So... Keep em comin'! I need the exercise! I have become secure in HIM so nothing can shake me or dissuade me from His purpose for me. I will not stop, back down, run in fear, be frozen in my commitment! I will not be governed by bitterness, resentment or any other naughty bunnies who try to foil me with their silly plots. Jesus Christ is God and Governor of my life. He is my guide and I know beyond the shadow of doubt, that He is calling me, equipping me and leading me into territory I have not yet discovered! With this knowledge I will strive to remain humble to His leading, accepting to any word He sends my way through any avenue. I will remain willing to turn the other cheek if my yoke so nudges me! I still have a way to go, but I am further than when I began! My security is in His grace!
"Your grace and mercy, brought me through.
I'm living this moment because of YOU!
I'm living this moment because of YOU!
I want to thank you, and praise you too!
Your grace and mercy has brought me through."
Your grace and mercy has brought me through."
And now I will stop and sit at His feet for awhile and let Him place His yoke upon me once again, and I will bear it with the same mercy and grace He has shown me. I will follow His lead and go through whatever door He so chooses to open unto me for I must be obedient to His yoke.
Hope this helps someone who is struggling in this area of insecurity! Look to Him! He will guide you. His yoke is easy and He will make the burden light! It is for your protection!
Friday, February 8, 2013
Security "Equip"ment!
In securing one's home against intruders, one must first assess the danger entry points. A person secures their home because they have either experienced an intrusion, or intuition is guiding them to potential danger zones.We are to secure our heart in the same manner. Proverbs 4: 23 tells us to "Keep thy heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life." If we are living in fear and insecurity we cannot accomplish God's plan for us. He means for us to be tough and fight the good fight without timidity or fear. We are commanded to put His Word into our heart. We must daily guard our heart and keep it secure!
To further assist in securing your heart, I offer a few tools which have equipped me in this ongoing battle of keeping my heart guarded. I am only free from fear when I am "EQUIP"ped! The moment I let my guard down, you-know-who tries to break in and steal my "stuff"! There is unequivocally NO tool more powerful than the Word of God.
The following is a list of scriptures, books, music, quotes, and quips that have led my thoughts as I have prayerfully begun this process of securing my heart against the dangers of fear and insecurity. I will use verses from the King James Version because it is where I begin all my studies and the version I use for all memorization. If I need further explanation I usually go first to the Message, then to the Amplified and then on to the NIV and end up back again at the KJV! Just for further interpretation I may also read through several commentaries and concordances. I love the Commentaries by John Phillips, and am currently enjoying the Strong's Concordance app! I enjoy the YouVersion Bible app for iPhone and iPad as it has many versions as well as audio in several versions. I also refer to Olive Tree Bible Study app because I like the easy Verse Chooser, and its resourses and commentaries.
The main scripture that keeps propelling me forward is as follows:
11. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
12. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
13. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God that ye may be able to withstand in the evil days, and having done all to stand,
14. Stand therefore,having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
15. And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
16. Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
17. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:
18. Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;"
We can find thousands of tools of Security Equipment in His Word, but these are the tools God used to speak to me. As you dig deep into your heart and into His WORD you will find Him speaking to you in so many more areas.
Which brings me to my favorite all time scripture. It just seems to cover ALL!
Books I read while on this journey which address this subject matter.
A few quotes and quips that have kept me spurred on:
Finally I will end on this note!
There are NO acceptable EXCUSES for living in fear or uncertainty in your walk with God or for not thriving in the areas He wants to use you. Trust in Him, and if you are afraid, Saddle up, anyway!
To further assist in securing your heart, I offer a few tools which have equipped me in this ongoing battle of keeping my heart guarded. I am only free from fear when I am "EQUIP"ped! The moment I let my guard down, you-know-who tries to break in and steal my "stuff"! There is unequivocally NO tool more powerful than the Word of God.
Hebrews 4: 12-13
"For the Word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight; but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do."
The following is a list of scriptures, books, music, quotes, and quips that have led my thoughts as I have prayerfully begun this process of securing my heart against the dangers of fear and insecurity. I will use verses from the King James Version because it is where I begin all my studies and the version I use for all memorization. If I need further explanation I usually go first to the Message, then to the Amplified and then on to the NIV and end up back again at the KJV! Just for further interpretation I may also read through several commentaries and concordances. I love the Commentaries by John Phillips, and am currently enjoying the Strong's Concordance app! I enjoy the YouVersion Bible app for iPhone and iPad as it has many versions as well as audio in several versions. I also refer to Olive Tree Bible Study app because I like the easy Verse Chooser, and its resourses and commentaries.
The main scripture that keeps propelling me forward is as follows:
Matthew 25:14-30
King James Version (KJV)
"14 For the kingdom of heaven is as a man traveling into a far country, who called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods.
15 And unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability; and straightway took his journey.
16 Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made them other five talents.
17 And likewise he that had received two, he also gained other two.
18 But he that had received one went and digged in the earth, and hid his lord's money.
19 After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them.
20 And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more.
21 His lord said unto him, Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.
22 He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them.
23 His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.
24 Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed:
25 And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, there thou hast that is thine.
26 His lord answered and said unto him, Thou wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strawed:
27 Thou oughtest therefore to have put my money to the exchangers, and then at my coming I should have received mine own with usury.
28 Take therefore the talent from him, and give it unto him which hath ten talents.
29 For unto every one that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundance: but from him that hath not shall be taken away even that which he hath.
30 And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
It is through the study of this scripture that I realized God was calling me to something He had already placed in my hands to do. He had equipped me, but I was afraid and buried my abilities instead of increasing them. I now read this scripture often to propel myself forward. I want to hear "Well done, thou good and faithful servant!" I know my purpose and no longer walk in fear, but in trust!
It is through the study of this scripture that I realized God was calling me to something He had already placed in my hands to do. He had equipped me, but I was afraid and buried my abilities instead of increasing them. I now read this scripture often to propel myself forward. I want to hear "Well done, thou good and faithful servant!" I know my purpose and no longer walk in fear, but in trust!
The following are additional scriptures which I read, study, or often quote aloud:
(no specific order)
(no specific order)
Scriptures of EQUIPment:
- Hebrews 12: 2 - "Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God."
- Hebrews 12: 3 - "For consider Him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds."
- Galatians 6: 9 - "And let us not be weary in well doing; for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not."
- Hebrews 12:15 - "Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled."
- Ephesians 4:31 - 'Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice."
- Song of Solomon 8:6 - "Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm; for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave; the coals thereof are the coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame."
- II Timothy 2: 20-21
- 20. - "But in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and of silver, but also of wood and of earth; and some to honour, and some to dishonour.
- 21. - If a man therefore purge himself from these, he shall be a vessel unto honour, sanctified, and meet for the master's use, and prepared unto every good work."
- Proverbs 16: 18 - "Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall."
- James 5: 16 - "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."
- Ephesians 6: 16 - "Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked."
- II Timothy 1:7 - 'For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."
- James 4:7 - "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."
- Ephesians 6:10-18
11. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
12. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
13. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God that ye may be able to withstand in the evil days, and having done all to stand,
14. Stand therefore,having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
15. And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
16. Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
17. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:
18. Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;"
- John 16:24 - "Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name; ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full."
- Philippians 1: 6 - "Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ."
- Psalm 51:10 - "Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit with in me."
- Psalm 51;12 - "Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit."
We can find thousands of tools of Security Equipment in His Word, but these are the tools God used to speak to me. As you dig deep into your heart and into His WORD you will find Him speaking to you in so many more areas.
Which brings me to my favorite all time scripture. It just seems to cover ALL!
Philippians 4: 13 "I can do ALL things through Christ which strengtheneth me."
I interpret it two ways:
1: I can do anything He asks me to do because He will give me the strength to do it.
2: I can do all things GOING through Christ (by taking everything to Him), and He will equip me to do anything because it strengthens me to come to Him!
Books I read while on this journey which address this subject matter.
- "Courage, 100 verses for your daily journey." published by Freeman Smith. A devotional book which is a compilation of scripture, and quotes and quibs by various authors and speakers.
- "So long, Insecurity!" by Beth Moore
- "So long, Insecurity Group Experience Leaders Guide" by Beth Moore
- "Do it Afraid" by Joyce Meyer
- "Eat the Cookie, Buy the Shoes" by Joyce Meyer
- "The Courageous Woman" Devotional by Joyce Meyer
- "Unbroken" by Laura Hillenbrand
- "The Noticer" by Andy Andrews
- "The Butterfly Effect" by Andy Andrews
- "The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness" by Timothy Keller
- "More to Life" Bible Study by UPCI
- "Alive in Him" by UPCI
- "Keepers of God's Dream" - by Joy Haney
- "Put on Your Warcoat and Fight" by Joy Haney
- "The Complete Works of E. M. Bounds on Prayer " By Edward M. Bounds
A few quotes and quips that have kept me spurred on:
- "You can't unscramble eggs!" I heard a message by Billy Graham where he said this.
- "The best is yet to be!" - Corrie Ten Boom
- "Life is tough! It's even tougher when you're stupid!" - John Wayne
- "Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway!" - John Wayne
- "The only way you can experience abundant life is to surrender your plans to Him." -Charles Stanley
- "Are you fearful? First, bow your head and pray for God's strength. Then, raise your head and look Old Man Trouble squarely in the eye. Chances are, Old Man Trouble will blink." - Jim Gallery
Finally I will end on this note!
Joshua 1:9
"Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed; for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest!"
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
A Field of Wrong
"Root them out, Get them gone!
All the naughty bunnies
In the field of wrong.
Jealousy
Malice
Envy
Pride
All the naughty bunnies in my heart shall not abide!"
I learned this little song so many years ago, I can't even remember when or where. Most likely Sunday School! It speaks to me often whenever a root of bitterness starts to spring up. There are even hand-signs to go with it, and I laugh at myself because I can't help but use them while I am singing! It's a cute little song, but carries a powerful meaning!
You may ask what in the world does this have to do with insecurity? It's not pretty, and this isn't one of the blogs I've enjoyed writing because I am going to plow deep into my own experience. I hate plowing, but it is necessary for my growth and fulfillment! If insecurity goes unfettered, unchecked, and you are not trying to overcome, before you even realize it you will be standing in a whole field of "wrong"! We all must deal with the hateful little bunnies hopping around in our heart!
Jealousy is one of the worst. To say it is as cruel as the grave, is the most accurate description of it, for where jealousy is allowed to stay, relationships are killed. It is the enemy to family, marriage, and friendships. It starts with a little root of insecurity, and it grows to full blown hate if not dealt with. It justifies itself and has an alibi for every hateful fiery dart it secretly sends.
Jealousy is deceitful. People who are jealous of you, when confronted, will make you think you are imagining insults. There is very little hard proof of jealousy, until it's too late. The destruction it leaves in its path is often never repaired. And it breeds more of the same. If jealousy is in your heart toward another, it will cause you to react in hateful ways that you did not even know you were capable of. It is contagious. It can spread like wildfire if it is successful in its deceit. The most insecure people are often the carriers of it. A little spiteful word here, a white lie there can plant seeds of doubt about people you genuinely love and respect. The insecure person is deceived into thinking these little fiery darts are drawing you closer to them and away from the person who is the target, but we must recognize and stop it before it does permanent damage. Do not play into anothers jealous rages or you too will experience the destruction of it. Jealousy tears down everything. I have had it try to take root in my heart, and I have also been the target of it. I do not want any part of either. If we are honest we will admit to this day there are people who you and I should be friends with, whom we love and have much in common with, but either on our part or theirs, jealousy has been allowed to damage our relationship to the point where it is completely broken. Once a certain level of hurt has been dealt by the jealous hand, it is next to impossible to restore trust. Sadly, unbridled insecurity was the root of it all. Root it out! Get it gone! Plow deep!
Malice is it's sibling! None of us would ever admit to being malicious, but we have all done malicious deeds and we have been bullied by people full of malice. It is a ugly hole, of which no child of God should be a part. We have all been told that if we challenge a bully he will back down. Not always so! There are mean malicious people who are intent on stepping on anyone in their path. People will do practically anything to make sure they are not overshadowed. Insecurity is dangerous! If you allow it to grow in your heart, you will end up being someone to avoid at all cost. If God does not intervene there is little that can stop the vengeance that is bred in the field of an insecure heart. Malice is a desire to inflict injury, harm, or suffering on another, and I will add in the mind of another. Us "christian folk" like to say we would never be so evil, however let someone's name be mentioned whom we may feel a little threatened by, or who annoys us, or who may be getting a bit more attention and we are quick to roll our eyes, sneer, or make a spiteful remark about them. We have just tried to plant malice in the heart of another. The heart is deceitfully wicked. Who can know it? Pull it up by the roots! Get it out!
Envy is the triplet of jealousy and malice. It can sneak up so quickly that you don't even recognize it in your own heart. If you have been feeling a little spiteful toward someone, check your heart for envy. The dictionary defines envy as a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to the advantages, success, possessions of others. We understand envy with regard to possessions, and freely admit we struggle with that level of envy. However, to admit you are envious toward another because of their success or advantages, well, that just makes us sound mean! Yep... even malicious! If you are not secure in your own abilities, it is most likely that envy is a nemesis around your neck. If you can ever conquer envy and learn to be happy and celebrate others successes, you will be able to walk in joy! To share in the accomplishments and advantages of others does not diminish you in any way. In fact, quite the opposite. It adds to you. Their advantages and connections can be used to multiply you as well unless you have allowed envy to become malicious jealousy which destroyed any hope for the relationship. Celebrate others joys so that when your joy is full they will rejoice with you as well!
Pride... yuck! Some of the most insecure people in the world are the most boastful prideful people! We all know those who are so hung up on themselves that they cannot have a conversation without self promoting. If you will watch and learn, you will soon recognize that the boastful prideful spirit is born of deep insecurity. These people are their own worst enemy and sadly they probably won't ever be quiet enough to listen, recognize or strive for improvement! There is also pride on another level born of deep hidden insecurity in those of us who try to appear as if we never have anything go wrong in our lives, who refuse to show our "stuff" so to speak. Don't let us fool you; we have baggage upon baggage! We are so full of pride we can't risk being seen failing forward.
How will anyone ever learn from you? How will you ever progress?
It can easily be said by me that this has been the naughty bunny that I have had to overcome! Yeah, it's a little embarrassing to admit it, and I feel like I just got burned by a hot iron by sharing, but it's the truth, and I promised deep plowing! So there ya go! You know my ugly secret... but I am not alone! There are others struggling with this level of pride and self indulgence! It is a selfish and "all about me" level to stoop to and very difficult to overcome. I have really, really really wanted everyone to think I had it all together! When things went wrong, I was left with no option but retreat because I had not left any possibility for anything else! I would retreat into my world of failure, till I could recoup my losses. During this time of retreat, I pity any who tried to enter my bear cave! I would react harshly to scare everyone off because I would rather them see my hatefulness than my failure! This is an entire new level of mistrust. I just read this to my husband and he said "Are you sure you want to say that about yourself?" Ha Ha! If sharing my failings and weakness, in so blatantly honest a manner, will help someone else recognize their own insecurity and deal with it... then yes! It's ok for me to share! If I can't be transparent my entire point and God's plan for this is lost! He can take what's wrong and make it right! I trust HIM! He has been my deliverer! He has been my mirror! He has shown me myself and has helped me to overcome in my field of wrong! He has shown me that reaching out to others is the only possible way out of this particular field. I stand before you today saying... "I have overcome!" I won't say I have won yet, because I know I have alot of room for improvement but I am confident that Christ will complete that in me which was begun if I will keep reaching for others. He has plowed and planted in me and has shown me where I need to change. He has remade my stony heart into a much more pliable one! He has been the potter, and I was the ugly clay! He is molding and making me into all that He has planned for me to become! I still have a long way to go, but I am moving forward! I am diligently seeking His guidance, and His word promises that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him!
"Lord, I pray that you continually reveal what needs to be changed in me so that I may be an effectual child of God. Create in me a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me. I desire to be a vessel that you can flow through. I want to be clean and pure in your sight. I want to be willing, able, and ready when you call on me in a moments notice to help those who walk with me on this journey of discovery!"
We are overcomers! We will plow deep, clean out our field of wrong, and be a recipient of all the fullness of HIS JOY!
Monday, February 4, 2013
It's a deep well and I will dip gently!
I am stopping in to say how humbled and grateful I am for the responses and support I have received at this endeavor.
My sweet husband reminded me that this is a deep well I am dipping into and to be gentle with it! I have learned so much about the subject I have tackled in the past few days. It is a process for me as well and I do not pretend to imply that I have conquered my own insecurities! I am a work in progress! Especially in these past few days and weeks that I have begun this journey, I have been reminded of my humanity and all its weakness. But I know that in my weakness His strength is made perfect. That is the only hope of perfection I can ever aspire to!
It used to be that I was such a perfectionist that I would hardly do anything because I was so fearful of failure. Somehow I thought being the perfect wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter, saint was actually attainable, and if I could not be perfect it was best to just do nothing. I did not realize that I was playing right into what was being fed into my mind by the enemy of my soul. If I could have some of those early years back along with the knowledge I now have, I would play more, fail more, fall more, stumble more... and ultimately get up and do more! I can't go back, but I certainly can go forward! I hope that on my journey forward that I can pave the way for those walking with me who are struggling to juggle it all, and not drop any balls. It's ok to drop a few! Some of them aren't worth keeping in the air anyway! It is only in failing that I am driven to be better! God wants our best, and He will make it perfect! He is the one who makes all things new, and does all things well! I want to honor Him in spite of all my failings by going forward with them.
Some of the times I have stumbled along my path are because I wasn't looking, sometimes I wasn't paying attention, but often He was trying to show me something new! He was trying to perfect in me that which I wouldn't trust into His loving guiding hands. Doing NOTHING is not perfecting you. It is not growing you. In fact, it is in doing nothing that you fall into danger. It is not dangerous to be wrong and learn how to do better if you are allowing Him to perfect you, but it is dangerous to be wrong and refuse to get up and get better!
I have learned that If I will sit at His feet and allow Him to show me the next step, He is going to lead me to a fulfilling joy! When we are closest to God we can see ourselves working for Him and with joy accomplishing great things. I feel that those things which we see ourselves achieving, conquering, excelling in, are the very things God is calling us to do for His kingdom! However if we have distanced ourselves from Him, or shut our ears to His voice, we can't feel the joy and we are consumed by the dread of having to do it on our own strength. God is not calling you to something which you do not enjoy. He is calling and leading you to the very things you love the most! He is not a cruel God who delights in seeing you suffer! He wants your JOY to be FULL! My prayer this week is for Him to reveal to us the very things He is calling us to and has equipped us for. I want to exercise in those areas to make myself better! When I have done my homework, I will not have reason to be ashamed! When I am doing my best and fail, it is much easier than when I know I didn't do the work!
Remember you are going to fail! You are going to make mistakes. If you are not currently making any mistakes, well... I don't want to ride in a car with you, or sit near you, or be in your house, because God is fixing to call you home! You have achieved perfection. I want to go to heaven when everyone else does in the rapture! I don't want to get there early!
I am praying for every person who wants to be freed to do all that God is drawing them to! May your ears be opened to His voice, and may you be willing to fail! He is faithful to help you! Fall into HIM! He will always catch you!
If you are following my blog, I would love your input, and for you to share! You can always inbox me! I know that it is hard to admit that you have insecurities and failures! I have been right there and was the girl in the bookstore who was hiding my book because I didn't want anyone to see my weakness by reading the title "So Long, Insecurity" by Beth Moore! Yep! That was me!
My sweet husband reminded me that this is a deep well I am dipping into and to be gentle with it! I have learned so much about the subject I have tackled in the past few days. It is a process for me as well and I do not pretend to imply that I have conquered my own insecurities! I am a work in progress! Especially in these past few days and weeks that I have begun this journey, I have been reminded of my humanity and all its weakness. But I know that in my weakness His strength is made perfect. That is the only hope of perfection I can ever aspire to!
It used to be that I was such a perfectionist that I would hardly do anything because I was so fearful of failure. Somehow I thought being the perfect wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter, saint was actually attainable, and if I could not be perfect it was best to just do nothing. I did not realize that I was playing right into what was being fed into my mind by the enemy of my soul. If I could have some of those early years back along with the knowledge I now have, I would play more, fail more, fall more, stumble more... and ultimately get up and do more! I can't go back, but I certainly can go forward! I hope that on my journey forward that I can pave the way for those walking with me who are struggling to juggle it all, and not drop any balls. It's ok to drop a few! Some of them aren't worth keeping in the air anyway! It is only in failing that I am driven to be better! God wants our best, and He will make it perfect! He is the one who makes all things new, and does all things well! I want to honor Him in spite of all my failings by going forward with them.
Some of the times I have stumbled along my path are because I wasn't looking, sometimes I wasn't paying attention, but often He was trying to show me something new! He was trying to perfect in me that which I wouldn't trust into His loving guiding hands. Doing NOTHING is not perfecting you. It is not growing you. In fact, it is in doing nothing that you fall into danger. It is not dangerous to be wrong and learn how to do better if you are allowing Him to perfect you, but it is dangerous to be wrong and refuse to get up and get better!
I have learned that If I will sit at His feet and allow Him to show me the next step, He is going to lead me to a fulfilling joy! When we are closest to God we can see ourselves working for Him and with joy accomplishing great things. I feel that those things which we see ourselves achieving, conquering, excelling in, are the very things God is calling us to do for His kingdom! However if we have distanced ourselves from Him, or shut our ears to His voice, we can't feel the joy and we are consumed by the dread of having to do it on our own strength. God is not calling you to something which you do not enjoy. He is calling and leading you to the very things you love the most! He is not a cruel God who delights in seeing you suffer! He wants your JOY to be FULL! My prayer this week is for Him to reveal to us the very things He is calling us to and has equipped us for. I want to exercise in those areas to make myself better! When I have done my homework, I will not have reason to be ashamed! When I am doing my best and fail, it is much easier than when I know I didn't do the work!
Remember you are going to fail! You are going to make mistakes. If you are not currently making any mistakes, well... I don't want to ride in a car with you, or sit near you, or be in your house, because God is fixing to call you home! You have achieved perfection. I want to go to heaven when everyone else does in the rapture! I don't want to get there early!
I am praying for every person who wants to be freed to do all that God is drawing them to! May your ears be opened to His voice, and may you be willing to fail! He is faithful to help you! Fall into HIM! He will always catch you!
If you are following my blog, I would love your input, and for you to share! You can always inbox me! I know that it is hard to admit that you have insecurities and failures! I have been right there and was the girl in the bookstore who was hiding my book because I didn't want anyone to see my weakness by reading the title "So Long, Insecurity" by Beth Moore! Yep! That was me!
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