It's a deep well and I will dip gently!

I am stopping in to say how humbled and grateful I am for the responses and support I have received at this endeavor.

 My sweet husband reminded me that this is a deep well I am dipping into and to be gentle with it!  I have learned so much about the subject I have tackled in the past few days.  It is a process for me as well and I do not pretend to imply that I have conquered my own insecurities!  I am a work in progress! Especially in these past few days and weeks that I have begun this journey, I have been reminded of my humanity and all its weakness.  But I know that in my weakness His strength is made perfect.  That is the only hope of perfection I can ever aspire to! 

It used to be that I was such a perfectionist that I would hardly do anything because I was so fearful of failure.  Somehow I thought being the perfect wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter, saint was actually attainable, and if I could not be perfect it was best to just do nothing.  I did not realize that I was playing right into what was being fed into my mind by the enemy of my soul.  If I could have some of those early years back along with the knowledge I now have, I would play more, fail more, fall more, stumble more... and ultimately get up and do more!  I can't go back, but I certainly can go forward! I hope that on my journey forward that I can pave the way for those walking with me who are struggling to juggle it all, and not drop any balls.  It's ok to drop a few! Some of them aren't worth keeping in the air anyway! It is only in failing that I am driven to be better!  God wants our best, and He will make it perfect! He is the one who makes all things new, and does all things well!  I want to honor Him in spite of all my failings by going forward with them.

 Some of the times I have stumbled along my path are because I wasn't looking, sometimes I wasn't paying attention, but often He was trying to show me something new!  He was trying to perfect in me that which I wouldn't trust into His loving guiding hands.  Doing NOTHING is not perfecting you. It is not growing you.  In fact, it is in doing nothing that you fall into danger.  It is not dangerous to be wrong and learn how to do better if you are allowing Him to perfect you, but it is dangerous to be wrong and refuse to get up and get better! 

I have learned that If I will sit at His feet and allow Him to show me the next step, He is going to lead me to a fulfilling joy!  When we are closest to God we can see ourselves working for Him and with joy accomplishing great things.  I feel that those things which we see ourselves achieving, conquering, excelling in,  are the very things God is calling us to do for His kingdom!  However if we have distanced ourselves from Him, or shut our ears to His voice,  we can't feel the joy and we are consumed by the dread of having to do it on our own strength. God is not calling you to something which you do not enjoy.  He is calling and leading you to the very things you love the most!  He is not a cruel God who delights in seeing you suffer!  He wants your JOY to be FULL!  My prayer this week is for Him to reveal to us the very things He is calling us to and has equipped us for.  I want to exercise in those areas to make myself better!  When I have done my homework, I will not have reason to be ashamed!  When I am doing my best and fail, it is much easier than when I know I didn't do the work!  

Remember you are going to fail! You are going to make mistakes.  If you are not currently making any mistakes, well... I don't want to ride in a car with you, or sit near you, or be in your house, because God is fixing to call you home! You have achieved perfection. I want to go to heaven when everyone else does in the rapture!  I don't want to get there early!

I am praying for every person who wants to be freed to do all that God is drawing them to!  May your ears be opened to His voice, and may you be willing to fail! He is faithful to help you! Fall into HIM! He will always catch you!

If you are following my blog, I would love your input, and for you to share! You can always inbox me!  I know that it is hard to admit that you have insecurities and failures!  I have been right there and was the girl in the bookstore who was hiding my book because I didn't want anyone to see my weakness by reading the title "So Long,  Insecurity" by Beth Moore! Yep! That was me!